Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize