i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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