i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize
