My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
