I love black thongs
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
