you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
