you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Randomize
