you didnt know i had herpes?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
