She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
