Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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