Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
