I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
