Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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