On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
