is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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