My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
