He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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