we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Are my feet made of real feet?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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