i just had sex bonerless
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize