does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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