exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
are you so shy because you have an std?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
