grinding to god bless the USA? really?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened