He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
It was like getting head from an anaconda
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
