He is an equal opportunity slut.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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