i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize