umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
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