She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Randomize
