There is no way he is gay with that hair.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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