Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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