we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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