There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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