the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Randomize