Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
