So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
