its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
