I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
