Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize