Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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