Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
