I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize