I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whose ass print is on the piano?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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