Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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