Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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