Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing. http://tfl.nu/feuq
  Replies (17) Good night (725) Bad night (2524)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners. http://tfl.nu/k7br
  Replies (79) Good night (1969) Bad night (6970)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing. http://tfl.nu/h8rn
  Replies (49) Good night (1134) Bad night (5511)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training. http://tfl.nu/j8m4
  Replies (2) Good night (2264) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues. http://tfl.nu/ej4i
  Replies (5) Good night (2796) Bad night (1081)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  You're like the curious george of whores

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): You're like the curious george of whores http://tfl.nu/l01l
  Replies (5) Good night (3523) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises. http://tfl.nu/ybn2
  Replies (14) Good night (2842) Bad night (1183)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement. http://tfl.nu/314h
  Replies (10) Good night (1330) Bad night (2879)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable. http://tfl.nu/f89d
  Replies (7) Good night (2733) Bad night (1213)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover. http://tfl.nu/8660
  Replies (8) Good night (1605) Bad night (724)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use. http://tfl.nu/kozs
  Replies (7) Good night (1186) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (228): View more from Mississippi

  Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (228): Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me. http://tfl.nu/qpkp
  Replies (1) Good night (713) Bad night (922)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up http://tfl.nu/xoz1
  Replies (9) Good night (2034) Bad night (520)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck. http://tfl.nu/fj8t
  Replies (29) Good night (899) Bad night (2011)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  You're perfect

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign. (203): You're perfect http://tfl.nu/d0zl
  Replies (17) Good night (1037) Bad night (725)

Randomize