Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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