His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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