I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
