i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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