idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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