The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
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Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
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It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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