WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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