what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
